Funny

10 Things That Happen When You Bump Into People From High School

By Albert Cho - 13 Oct 2017

You would think that graduating from high school means new beginnings and a brand new you. You meet people outside your regular social circle and you get to show the world who you really are! To break the honest truth, high school is NEVER over. Auckland’s a small city so it’s inevitable that you’ll run in to somebody who you spent those awkward years with. We all go through it and we all HATE it. Here are some of the most common things that happen when you bump into people from high school. And yes, we know you just want to be in a hole and never come out. 

1.    Avoiding eye contact

We do anything to not stop and chat because let’s be real, we don’t give two craps about how that person’s been doing. The most common method would be to look down at your phone and pretend you’re typing an intense message. If you really want to up the ante, fake a phone call so it would be considered rude to interrupt.

2.    You Wonder Why You Didn’t Dress Up

You wouldn’t be avoiding eye contact if you felt on FLEEK. You’d be trying to get that person’s attention so they can spread the word about how much hotter you’ve gotten since high school. But you look like you just rolled out of bed and you feel disgusting. So yeah, stick to the tip given above.

3.    The Shame Of The Fresher Five

Gaining weight after high school is almost unavoidable. You’re moving less, your parents aren’t making you nutritious meals and you’re drinking a whole lot more alcohol. You really don’t mind the extra weight until you bump in to an old high school mate and you can’t help but wonder if they’ve realised your extra rolls. Because you sure did realize with them.

4.    Suck In Your Cheeks And Tense Your Facial Muscles

Fake it till you make it. Just because you’ve gained 5kgs, doesn’t mean you can’t pull out some classic tricks out of your sleeve. A lot of us are guilty of tensing the facial muscles and lengthening the neck to give a slimming and defined effect. Contouring doesn’t always need bronzers and brushes!

5.    Acting Busy And Successful

So you failed to avoid eye contact and you have no choice but to stop and talk. This is when you talk about how hectic your schedule is, striving for A grades while juggling an internship and a social life. When in reality, you’re sticking to the motto of “C’s get degrees” and spending your nights alone on Netflix. There’s nothing worse than peaking in high school, we want to look like we’ve made progress! 

6.    Pretending Like You Care

Sometimes you just gotta be the bigger person and at least pretend you’re interested in what that person is saying. You know they’re going to go and tell people about how downhill you’ve gone physically. The least you could do is make up for that in personality by being polite. Just smile and nod (smiling gives off the effect that you’re happy, so that’s a bonus).

7.    Ending It ASAP

You’ve smiled and nodded while thinking slim for far too long that your face hurts. The conversation goes nowhere because all you’re doing is boasting about yourself. It’s important to know, that person is probably in the same boat as you and wants to get on with their own life. Back to point number five, we make an excuse to make us look like we’re too busy and successful to stop and talk. 

8.    Run 

Remember, you’re busy and successful. You have people to see and places to go, you don’t have time to have a nice stroll. You make your lies believable and run away from what just happened or at least power walk.

9.    Reflect

What just happened? What did I just say? What do they think of me? So many questions going around your head and then you finally reach the point of asking the biggest question yet… Why do I care so much? This is when you…

10.    Move on 

We brush it off as it’s no big deal. We all progress at different times and different ways. But we all hope that it never happens again, ever. 

Want more:

Our best stories, direct to your inbox, helping you to out-trend your mates every weekend...

Tags:

Funny

You May Also Like