Funny

18 Things Only Peanut Butter Lovers Will Understand

By Natasha Van Der Laan - 23 Aug 2017

Peanut Butter

Peanut butter isn’t a food—it’s an obsession. No bowl of porridge is complete without a big dollop of PB and if there’s no nutty goodness in that smoothie, we don’t want to know about it. It’s a jar-a-week habit.

Here are 18 things only the truly peanut butter obsessed will understand. How many are you guilty of?

  1. In your opinion, no day is complete without peanut butter.
  2. Actually—scratch that. No MEAL is complete without it.
  3. You have multiple jars on the go at any one time. After all, there’s a massive difference between crunchy with salt and crunchy without salt.
  4. Your jars are scattered throughout town—one at work, one at your boyfriend’s flat, one at your parents’ house and, like, six at home.
  5. Your movie snack of choice? Pic’s peanut butter slugs. Excuse me while I suck out its deliciousness.
  6. You’ve become a total peanut butter snob. Dad’s budget stuff just doesn’t do it for you anymore.
  7. You let out a squeal of delight when you discover a new PB brand or flavour.
  8. When Fix & Fogg released their limited edition fruit toast flavour you—quite simply—lost your shit.
  9. And you know the secret to a bad ass satay sauce or massaman curry is Fix & Fogg’s smoke and fire PB.
  10. Nothing brings you more joy than using the peanut butter TAP at Good For.
  11. You get your daily fruit and veg quota by topping peanut butter on everything. Apple, banana, carrot, celery... there’s nothing you won’t peanut butter-ify.
  12. But, let’s be honest, you don’t need to put it on anything—you eat it by the spoonful.
  13. Heck, you’ve been known to forgo the spoon. Your finger is as good a spoon as any.
  14. You go to food shows and markets solely to stock up nutty goodness.
  15. You use the health benefits to justify the obsession. It’s packed with good fats and protein, y’know?
  16.  You dabble in alternative nut butters—almond, cashew and hazelnut—but it’s not the same. There is only one nut butter and it begins with “pea”.
  17. You find yourself writing an article about your addiction, spoon of peanut butter in hand.
  18. THIS is your favourite song:

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