TV & Movies

47 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode 3

By Urban List Writers - 13 Jun 2018

47 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island  Episode 3

Like a persistent rash, the country's favourite critically acclaimed show is back for another trip to the island. Giving swingers in the '70s a run for their money, already we've seen betrayal, tears and challenges so tragically bad we. Can’t. Stop. Watching. 

  1. Ruby’s rejuvenation tip: bang Kristian. Hard pass. 
  2. This is either Weiting’s attempt to a) hold Harry’s hand b) drag him back to her boo-ray or c) drag him past the other girls fast enough before spots another 'possum.' #keeper
  3. Will Georgia fall victim to the Harry epidemic? Only time will tell.
  4. You mean your heart got broken on Heartbreak island Gennedy? *Gasp*
  5. Looks like Joshua has made a bit of a mess of things. The eggs don’t lie. 
    47 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode 3
  6.  Gennedy wants to crack one of those eggs over Joshua’s head.
  7. “Being bitter isn’t in my nature” and raw kale is a delightful snack.
    47 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode 3
  8. Joshua’s seriously reconsidering if this 100k is really worth it.
  9. Looks like TinderElla is finally getting her happily ever after!
  10. *David Attenborough voice* and here we see the ballsack of humanity take part in the communal mating call known as ‘the flex’
  11. Fresh meat? Tiffany’s got an appetite for Tavita.
  12. And, by trying new things, she means Tavita’s T-bone.
  13. Tiffany, if you win the 100k, treat yourself to some dance classes.
  14. Josh is going for the slam dunk but it doesn’t look like Tiffany’s looking to bounce his ball.
  15. "Keep doing cute shit." When did you start?
    47 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode 3
  16. Two halves of a whole idiot.
  17. If I had an ego that big I’d need a ruby sized floaty to hold me up too.
    47 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode 3
  18. Anyone else wondering if Harry actually has any clue what's actually going on?
  19. What does Matilda know about heartbreak anyway? She won her show.
  20. If you pay careful attention you can see even the hosts want out. Don't worry Matootles, we still love you!
  21. The ball breaker.. bet whoever dreamed that one up is patting themselves on the back right now.  
  22. I bet these weren't the balls they thought they’d be playing with when they signed up. 
  23. Oh brilliant. Now they’re going to put one of these meatheads behind the wheel too? Hope it comes with a helmet. 
    47 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode 3
  24. Is the show sponsored by Fonterra too?
  25. They're really milking this challenge for all they can. 
    47 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode 3
  26. Weiting’s really aiming for Harry. Getting the panels is just a bonus.
  27. Feels like we're witnessing a shit episode of survivor.
    47 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode 3
  28. Kelsey's no rookie when it comes to balls.
    47 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode 3
  29. Joshua waiting till Gennedy had a wine in hand to talk is the most tactical thinking we’ve seen in the series so far.
  30. Tiffany’s looking to get a little more personal than just training.
  31. Where’s Harry’s fashion expertise when you need it?
  32. So the truth comes out, Tiffany's only looking for a side dish. 
    47 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode 3
  33. And they feed.
    47 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode 3
  34. Kermit is not impressed.
  35. Too little too late, Josh.
  36. Stacey too!? Tactical Tiffany is making her way around the track faster than a TURBO CHARGED SUZUKI SWIFT.
  37. We don’t get it either, sis.
  38. Georgia: *Maybe if I lie still enough they’ll both go away*
  39. Still Weiting for a prince charming.. that might be a different island.
  40. The problem Josh, is that nobody cares enough to predict it.
  41. Holding on to the last shred of hope I have for humanity watching Stacey and Shayna.  #Stayna
  42. So much for no hard feelings Gennady!?
  43. Can't wait to attend Tavita's funeral after Gennady finds out about his new side piece. Dead man walking.
    47 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode 3
  44. “Kristian is a little pussy”...tell me something I don't know. 
  45. When you don’t know what's going on in your own show
  46. Looks like the clock struck twelve for Tinderella!
  47. It was only a short-haul flight for pilot Izaak.

At that concludes another instalment of riveting, hard-hitting drama. Who will Tiffany target next? How popular are the new contestants? Will Joshua eat even more eggs? Only time will tell as we follow the show rubbing the nation up in all the wrong ways. 

Image Credit: Heartbreak Island

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