TV & Movies

52 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode Two

By Urban List Writers - 12 Jun 2018

52 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode Two

What happens when you mix a floating cocktail bar, group of soon-to-be (wannabe) influencers, and all the booze they can handle? A bloody entertaining show, that’s what! In just the second episode alone we’ve already seen more than 70% of the couples split up and even a few tears! Now that our faces have recovered from extreme cringing, here are our thoughts while paying witness to this train-wreck waiting to happen.

  1. Looks like paradise was too good to be true!
  2. Izaak and Ruby can’t get into that room fast enough. 
    54 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode Two
  3. Who’s sleeping where? Kelsey’s hoping it’s as far apart as possible.
  4.  Harry’s looking at Kelsey like she’s the beauty to his beast.
  5. Pink is Kristian’s favourite colour? So millennial.
  6. When Kristian said he was the prize, he wasn’t kidding! Weiting is loving this.
  7.  Like seriously who let Jordan Mauger back on our screens? We want answers.
    54 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode Two
  8. Not even a minute in and Tavita is telling TinderElla she smells. At least he finds himself funny.
  9. “I think I managed to get across I wasn’t a creep or anything." Yeah you only suggested a shower together.. #nailed it. 
  10.  Doesn’t look like Julius is getting that spark he was after. 
  11.  Poor Joshua’s still has PTSD from being catfished. 
  12. Gennady looks like she’s ready to pounce.
    54 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode Two
  13. "How you doin?" A man who knows his friends is ace in our books.
  14. “It’s nice to be good looking”...aaaaaaand never mind.
  15. We went from being driven to having a good bum. Oh how the mighty have fallen.  
    54 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode Two
  16. His anaconda don’t want none unless you got buns hun.
    54 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode Two
  17. We have a feeling this isn’t the only snake we’ll be seeing on this show.
  18. Poor Tinderella, we hope you’ll find a fella!
  19. Kristian and Weiting have called it quits already! And he’s all geared up for a switch.
    54 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode Two
  20. I hope these fish are ready for Kristian the shark.
    54 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode Two
  21. You may not want to kiss and tell Isaak, but your grin says it all.
  22. Tavita’s looking like he hasn’t dipped any toes in the water of romance. 
  23. Watch out Kelsey and Tiffany, tidal wave Tavita is heading your way.
  24. Whaaaat…Kelsey’s changed her mind on Harry?! That must’ve been some first night!
  25. Naw, Izaak sounds like he’s already won the competition.
    54 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode Two
  26. This looks like a bad horror movie. Cloud Nine: Invasion Of The Meatheads. 
  27. “Sippy Lala’s” ...Harry is a walking talking Urban Dictionary.
  28. Did TinderElla really just say her top pick was HARRY?! Is she on the same island?
    54 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode Two
  29. The boys are all looking like they want breakfast with Tiffany.
    54 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode Two
  30. If you’re going to make them dance TVNZ, do your contestants a favour and hire a choreographer. 
    54 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode Two
  31. The only thing Jo’s judging are these morons.
    54 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode Two
  32. Joshua’s really outdone himself with Gennady’s cocktail.
    54 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode Two
  33. She is not impressed.
  34. Don’t know how to make a cocktail Tavita? We’ve got an article for that. 
  35. We’ll take Isaak’s sunshine over Joshua’s sludge any day.
  36. Can make a winning cocktail AND is the whole package!? Sign us up.
    54 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode Two
  37. We’re glad to see the show taking the #freethenipple movement seriously.
  38. Despite a winning cocktail Georgia’s ready to list Julius on Trademe. Ouch. 
    54 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode Two
  39. Izaak’s over. He’s cancelled.
    54 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode Two
  40. And in swoops Kristian. Ruby doesn't know what’s hit her! *Cue the Jaws soundtrack*
  41. Looks like Weiting found her way into Heartbreak Harry’s bed, mission accomplished. 
    54 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode Two
  42. She totally doesn’t regret it….
  43. Looks like the guys want to get to know you too Tiffany
  44. If looks could kill. Watch out for Weiting, Hazza.
  45. Is there really any question whether Joshua’s going to opt out?
  46. I don’t think Kelsey’s ever swiped left so fast.
    54 Thoughts We Had While Watching Heartbreak Island Episode Two
  47. Joshua mate, I’d watch out for hurricane Gennady if I were you.
  48. You shall go to the ball Tinderella!
  49. “Big ol’ booty" lucky girl.
  50. Looks like Harry just made an enemy.
  51. Harry. Is. Such. A. Prick.
  52. Looks like there’s trouble a-brewin' in paradise. With hurricane Gennedy coming on in full force and Weiting falling as the first victim of the Harry epidemic, we can only hope there aren’t more casualties as things heat up tomorrow. 

Image Credit: Heartbreak Island

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