We won’t call this one a ‘healthy’ snack per se but there is thickened cream in there and correct me if I’m wrong but cream is just chubby milk and milk is good for your bones (I just Googled that and apparently I am completely wrong because that calcium myth has been debunked but I’m going to leave it there because everything else on the list is one ingredient short of being plastic).
Today we bring you the best hot weather cure in our recipe arsenal and it’s about to strip years off your life. It’s the Violet Crumble Golden Gaytime sundae and it probably has more calories in it than an entire Wendy’s Fredo Frog ice cream cake. You’re welcome.
FYI this recipe ‘makes four’ (aka. one really big sundae). Here’s how to do it:
- 120g of dark chocolate, chopped
- 1/2 cup of thickened cream
- 3 Nestle Violet Crumbles (2 for the recipe, 1 for you)
- 240g packet of Golden Muffin Bites, Choc Fudge Brownie flavour, halved
- 4 scoops of Blue Ribbon Golden Gaytime ice cream
- Pop to the shops and pick up your ingredients. If you go to Woolworths, make sure you submit a formal complaint to the manager about their lack of homebrand Grain Waves. They giveth and then they taketh away WITHOUT ANY WARNING GODDAMIT.
- Head home and binge watch the entire fourth season of Brooklyn Nine-Nine on Netflix. Aside from McLeod’s Daughters, it is the most underrated television show of all time.
- Get to work combining the chopped up choccie with the thickened cream in a heatproof bowl. Microwave said bowl on high (DO NOT PUT FOIL ON BOWL), stirring every minute, for 2-3 minutes or until the mixture is completely melted and smooth. Put that bad boy aside for about 10 minutes to cool.
- Use a big ol’ kitchen blade to slice the Violet Crumbles diagonally into long triangular shards because #art.
- Divide the Muffin Bites (the ones you’d never heard of before but will now sprinkle on your Weetbix and grate onto your lattes every day for the rest of your life) among four serving glasses, the fanciest glasses you’ve got (for Instagram’s sake).
- Top each glass with a scoop of the good stuff (the Golden Gaytime ice cream), and then drizzle the whole thing with the chocolate sauce and finally top with the Violet Crumble shards.
- You did good, son, now Instagram a pic of this artery-clogger with the hashtag #onSundaeswewearGaytime.
Image credit: Isaac Smith