Dare Cold Pressed

Baristas have a tough gig—there’s the early hours, the standing on your feet, the making, what we can only refer to as, crimes against coffee. But hey, someone’s gotta to do it. We’re pretty much indebted to them for the coffee they’ve provided over the years

Waking up in the morning is kind of like calling your mum. It sucks, and you put it off almost every time, but they’re both things you pretty much have to do. We’re the type of people who have their morning routine so streamlined that we can snooze our alarms at least 10 times (our housemates love us!) and still be on time. 

Procrastination. It can make a damn fool out of the best of us. One minute you’re speeding through your to-do list, ticking shiz off left, right, and center, and then the next you’re knee deep in a Wikipedia page about Chop Chop Chang (that’s the first monkey in space, FYI).  Honestly, there’s no judgment here, we’re serial procrastinators through and through—hence why writing this list was so easy (apart from the time spent procrastinating).  

Don’t get us started on adulting, please. We’ve already had to quash those expectations our eight year old self had for 23 year old us, because—shockingly, might we add—we aren’t married, rich CEOS, with a bunch of kids, and wardrobe full of designer threads, and hundreds of adorable puppies. Rude. 

Oh 3:30pm, we know you well. You’re that time the clock seems to freeze on after having a crazy-productive morning, and after the excitement from pausing for your lunch break has worn off. 3:30pm is often marked by three easily recognisable symptoms: firstly, you’re procrastinating (hard), secondly, you’re craving something sugary, and lastly, you need a damn coffee. 

Ah, coffee. What would we do without you? Aside from being a tired, boring iteration of our former selves, we probably sound a whole lot less like the snob who says each of these things, because the coffee love is so, so real. 

Have you ever wondered what your afternoon snack says about you? Or, more importantly, what your co-worker’s choice of afternoon salvation says about them? Of course you have! This whole experiment is totally, 100% grounded in years of empirical research*, so these answers are going to have you feeling like a total psychic.