In the wise words of Justin Timberlake—we’re bringing sexy back (to the bedroom).
The world of sex toys is a big one, to say the least, and much like your skincare routine, it’s essential you invest in the best of the best. And to help you get on your way to premium bedroom bliss, we’d like to draw your attention to some snazzy bits and bobs guaranteed to jazz up—well, you know.
Here are the best sex toys so you can live your best life in the bedroom.
Moxie
Cost: $143.99
We totally vibe a step towards the future and that’s exactly what little Moxie is. This super quiet and discreet vibrator (which yes, looks exactly like the remote for you garage door) can be connected to We-Vibe’s We-Connect App which means you and your partner can play sex god wherever you are. It’s also waterproof which you know, speaks for itself on many levels.
Lovehoney X Love Not War Laksa Sustainable Rechargeable Rabbit Ears Vibrator
Cost: $134.95
If the brief sounds like a “tease and please” then you need to get your clit on at least one of Lovehoney’s brand spankin’ new and very first eco-conscious vibrators. You can’t go wrong with a classic “Rabbit Ear” situation and it’s the type of vibe that should be a staple in every toy drawer. This beauty is made from recycled, skin-friendly aluminium and soft, body-safe silicone so we really can’t dislike a sex toy that is not only good for you but good for the planet.
Hueman Saturn Galactic Silicone Vibrating Cock Ring
Cost: $64.95
For an outer-body experience like no other, you’re going to want to slide your fun bits into the shiny halo that is the Hueman Saturn Galactic Cock Ring. This guy flaunts a loop of ridges for a textural bout of stimulation and accelerates into three different speeds. You can whack this one on for solo play for a longer-lasting session (it’s got a run-time of 50 minutes) or add it into sex for some extra oomph.
Lifelike Lover Luxe Realistic Multicoloured Silicone Dildo 7 Inch
cost: $59.95
You can adult all you want but sometimes life decisions do come down to having the shiniest toy in the shop. Enter the Multicoloured Silicone Dildo, she’s a kaleidoscopic being of fun times ahead and we know she’s pretty but you should probably refrain from keeping her on display, especially if you live in a sharehouse. On top of this, she comes in a number of other colours like blue or red—whatever tickles your pickle’s fancy.
Rocks Off Petite Sensations Pearls 7 Function Vibrating Anal Beads
cost: $39.95
Nothing says a good time quite like vibrating anal beads. For those at the beginning of their backdoor play, these pearls are a great place to start and are made from velvety soft silicone. The super slim wand is also 100 percent waterproof and also has the thumbs up for any underwater fun you might want to dive into. On top of this, its silicone finish makes it hypoallergenic.
Womanizer Pro40 Clit Stimulator
cost: $189.95
The Womanizer Pro40 Clit Stimulator is more hi-tech than anything old mate Elon could come up with. She leads the “best sex toy” line-up by a long-run and has a cult-following more dedicated than a 90s kid growing up with Harry Potter. There are six intensity levels for varying sensations and an ergonomic design with silken silicone which basically puts the “lit” in clit. You’re welcome.
Womanizer Duo
cost: $329.95
Explosive is probably not the first word you want to hear when it comes to sex toys but stick with us. Giving a whole new meaning to “business in the front, party in the back”, it should come as no surprise that the Womanizer Duo is a double whammy in a very good way. What she lacks in affordability, she makes up with premium, heavenly and explosive bliss—absolutely unachievable elsewhere.
Head Master Vibrating Blow Job Stroker
cost: $29.95
We all know the best kind of sex toys are inconspicuous and this guy is king of subtleties in appearance. What may look like half a plastic water bottle to your housemates will actually be a textured tunnel giving you the big “O” every damn night. The best part? It vibrates, and it’s completely open-ended to suit all shafts shapes and sizes.
Bedtime Bullet 10 Function Vibrating Butt Plug 4 Inch
cost: $39.95
Much like an extra roll of toilet paper in the bathroom, the Bedtime Bullet is an underrated essential in the bedroom. In theory, sure, it sounds pretty underwhelming and no one actually thinks they need one but when it is there, everyone really appreciates the extra mile.
Desire Luxury Rechargeable Male Vibrator
cost: $144.95
If you’re getting ten pin bowling vibes then so are we, but don’t knock this juicy contraption until you’ve tried it. This guy comes with eight modes of vibration, 12 speeds and storage which may sound like an ad for an Audi g6 but trust us, it is so much better than that.
Need more inspo? Here are the best podcasts about sex.
Design credit: Kate Mason
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