Overheard In Melbourne This Week

By Clare Acheson
30th Mar 2016

Melbourne, we listened and you delivered. This week, you talked democracy, learning English as a second language, hating on ice-cream and internet sensation, Boaty McBoatface (lololololol). Read on for some hilarious wise cracks that were overheard in Melbourne this week. 

Cafe Culture

Person 1: All I want is a no-frills cafe experience. 
Person 2: What do you even mean by that?
Person 1: 
Like no edible flowers, no foams or frozen stuff, none of that bullshit.
Person 2: Oh... 
But I *like* frills!

Gelato Hatred

Person 1: So, this guy started freaking out about how the world doesn't need another insane gelato flavour.
Person 2: What do you mean, 'freaking out'?
Person 1: Like yelling about how the world has enough stupid gelato in it, and how we should all spend our time focussing on something REAL.
Person 2: Um... One man's gelato cone is another man's silent meditation retreat...?

Angel's Piss (Yes, Really)

Girl 1: Have you heard of a saying about angel’s piss?
Girl 2: Is this a saying that you made up once on a drunken night out?
Girl 1: 
NO! It’s a real saying. 
Girl 2: 
But who even says it?
Girl 1: My ex-boyfriend and all of his bogan mates?
Girl 2: ...
Girl 1: I said 'ex'.

Democratic Decisions

Person 1: I think they should have to call that $400 million boat Boaty McBoatface?
Person 2: Are you serious?! It's suuuuch a stupid name.
Person 1: Yeah, but they opened it up to public vote, and Boaty McBoatface won, fair and sqaure. 
Person 2: Okay, democracy, right, I get it. So you'd say the same about Donald Trump then?
Person 1: Um, I think what the British call a massive research boat is waaaaaaaay less significant than who is ruler of the USA. What power does a boat really have?

Learning English

Girl: My French housemate is learning English by going clubbing at Sircuit, and by watching Downtown Abbey.
Guy: Ahahahhaaaaaa that's hilarious, how's that working out for him?
Girl: Good actually, although I imagine there's a heap of confused dudes on Grindr being asked 'How do you do, Sir?'.

K-Pop Eurovision

Person 1: OMG did you see the news about a K-pop Eurovision?! It's going to be AH-MAY-ZING.
Person 2: It's going to be horrible, a bloodbath of weird fashion and synchrinised dance moves. 
Person 3: I don't get it. I mean, Korea is miles away from Europe...

Overheard something hilarious? Let us know!

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Image credit: Disney

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