For a host of reasons (namely having no money for rent and being blacklisted at the Swanston Street Maccas), ‘getting a drink’ with friends is not always the best catch up idea. That’s why we’ve put together a list of eight killer things to do in Melbourne with your mates that won’t have you craving 7-Eleven sausage rolls at 9am the next morning.
Lose Your Mind At South Melbourne Escape Room
Forget getting sloshed with your mates, tell ‘em to get lost. If you haven’t already been locked in a dungeon for seventy minutes with your nearest and dearest—now’s your chance. South Melbourne Escape Room combines excitement with catatonic claustrophobia to bring you over an hour of tricky puzzles and mind games that’ll have you Facetiming your mum faster than twelve tequila sunrises. With two unique challenges to choose from, you can either save your coworkers from imploding mines or be a magician’s assistant in Keller’s Magical Emporium. Either way, you’ll be able to drive home afterwards and not wake up the next morning with your head in an UberEATS bag.
Enrol In Foodie Classes At The Craft And Co.
Instead of massacring your brain cells with three bottles of sparkling and a dirty shoey, why not grow some new ones with a ‘how to’ class at The Craft & Co. Some of their upcoming sessions include a cheese making evening class, a FREE wine making demo, a gin botanical masterclass and a salami making evening class. There’s literally something for everyone, cured sausage addicts not excluded. For more info on upcoming classes, you can check out their calendar here.
Take Some Killer ‘Grams On A Stunning Bushwalk
Is your beer gut causing you to carve a few extra notches in your belt? Yeah, me either, these Target maternity stretch denim jeans just have way better diamante patterns than anything I could find at General Pants. If, perhaps, you and your friends feel like you have been having one too many cowboy shots lately, rather than hitting the pub for a vino again, you can tackle one of the many stunning bushwalks surrounding Melbourne. Here are ten of our faves.
Show Them How You Really Feel At Archery Attack
Got a friend you’d like to put an arrow through but can’t really afford to spend twenty-to-life behind bars right now? No wukkas, the folks over at Archery Attack have invented a fab new sport where you can shoot your friends with foam-tipped arrows for up to sixty minutes at a time without losing your right to international travel. As a result, the Reservoir-based team sport is gaining momentum in Melbourne, so head to the website now to book your spot.
Work Up A Sweat At Holey Moley Mini Golf
Somewhere between cruffins and shoe-shi rolls, mini golf on a Friday night in Melbourne became a socially acceptable pursuit. We’re not looking to point fingers or name names (Holey Moley Mini Golf), however if someone could take their friends to this Willy Wonka-style funhouse, complete with sleek airstream bars, cocktails, DJ decks, and a putt putt course that winds through an anti-gravity room, a 3D Pac-Man maze, an Iron Throne made of golf clubs and a Simpsons lounge room, and then tell us what all the fuss is about, that’d be great.
Draw Them Like One Of Your French Girls At Life Drawing
Tell your mates to put down the pot class and pick up the pencil with you at Melbourne’s premier ‘Life Drawing’ class in the CBD. For only $15, you can drop into level four of the Swanston Street Nicholson Building and have the opportunity to draw the human figure in a relaxed and friendly environment, which is a pretty underwhelming consolation prize for doing it on the decks of the Titanic, but we’ll take what we can get. In even better news, the $15 fee covers all materials, which is the equivalent of a jug of beer but with significantly fewer trips to the loo.
Watch A Movie Without Going Broke At Astor Cinema
The Astor is affordable, good value for money, cheap, not too expensive, kind on the wallet and sort of close to the beach. This classic, single-screen theatre has been screening flicks to biddies and boys perched in the stalls and dress circle since its grand opening in 1936 and shan’t be stopping anytime forthwith. Showing a combination of new releases and old school cult classics at $12 or $13 a pop (and sometimes back-to-back for only $17!!), watching new movies at an old cinema in St Kilda just became a safer investment than the property market.
Pat Kitties & Drink Lattes At The Cat Cafe
Grab the gals and trade the White Russian for a Russian Blue at Melbourne’s resident Cat Cafe. As the ancient Chinese proverb goes, “no amount of Smirnoff Vodka can fill the cat-sized hole in your heart”, and if the Chinese were right about anything, it’s that and steamed vegetarian dumplings. This feline cafe is the perfect substitute for a drink with friends because there are coffees to drink, treats to eat, floofs to boop (gently) and no bouncers telling you to have something to eat and go for a walk around the block. Head to the website to secure your spot in paradise.
Who are we kidding...you're gonna need booze eventually. Here are the best places to drink wine and eat cheese in Melbourne.
Image credit: Bustle