Funny

23 Thoughts You’ve Had On A First Date

By Grace Evans - 17 Jul 2017


First dates never usually go as you’d expect. You generally laugh out loud, fall over something and experience a lot of long awkward silences and if you’re lucky you may even make it out alive and perhaps even return for a second date. But you couldn't do any of it without sitting through those agonising thoughts of the first.

So just to reminisce on those painfully awkward, hilarious and sometimes great moments we have compiled a list of thoughts we’re sure you’ve experienced on your first date.

  1. It took me 2-4 hours to finally decide on an outfit (what a waste)
  2. An awkward hug rather than a kiss is surely suffice (or a hand hug)
  3. Am I sweating? Yep, that’s definitely sweat
  4. I have now lost all ability to string any reasonable sentences together
  5. Why does my body make so many strange noises and why haven’t I noticed it before?
  6. How do you tell someone you barely know there’s something in their teeth #cringe
  7. Holy sh*t that was the longest silence I’ve ever experienced
  8. God dammit when will the food come to break my agonising spill of word vomit
  9. Ew, why are they wearing that?
  10. Do I really need love to fulfil the meaning of life?
  11. Yep, it’s been 10 minutes and man I AM BORED, what is the next 10 years of my life going to be like with this human?
  12. I shall hold in all my strong opinions even though the human opposite to me is preaching the direct opposite of them
  13. MOVIE DATE—Of course there is a sex scene, where do I look, what do I do, is there some type of shell I could potentially crawl into?
  14. Donald Trump supporter you say??? CYA
  15. I hope the wine never stops coming and that it’s just like an endless smorgasbord of wine
  16. Soooo do you pay or do I pay, do we do splitsies?
  17. Oh brilliant my ex is here isn’t this just the cherry on top of a fabbo nite (god, take me now)
  18. Man I wish I could just shovel this food down the trap like I do at home (sobs)
  19. Wait what did they say? THINK THINK THINK
  20. I feel like our kids would look kinda weird
  21. I hope they think I’m the ultimate level of smokkkkkkiinn
  22. I wonder how long I could spend in the bathroom without looking like a total weirdo
  23. Maybe being single isn’t so bad after all 

Struggling to find the one? Here are your perfect matches based on your star sign, should help you out.

Image credit: Yahoo7

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