Restaurants

What’s In A Name? | The Funniest Restaurant Names In Australia

By Lucy Cook - 18 Dec 2014

With the pun stakes high, your wit can take the main stage because your Facebook check-ins just got a whole lot more hilarious. Australians are known for their humour, often a bit dirty and full of puns, and that has merged with our fantastic restaurant culture to produce a list of hilarious restaurant names that will have you in giggles between mouthfuls.

SYDNEY

Fleetwood Macchiato
Erskineville

Thunder only happens when it’s raining, coffee is only brilliant when it’s at Fleetwood Macchiato. We can’t guarantee you will be served by anyone called ‘Rhiannon’, ‘Sara’ or a ‘Gold Dust Woman’, but we can guarantee you’ll have ‘Big Love’ for this Erskineville café. The focus is on seasonal, sustainable and health conscious food, so your diet won’t ‘Landslide’ after giving them a visit. Their avocado toast is next level, with smoked chilli oil, black sesame, lemon, roasted nori, parsley and mint but ‘Don’t Stop’ at just that, give the free range braised pork a try, with house made apple kimchi, poached egg, peanuts, fried shallots and lime with toast.

Fleetwood Mac references in this post: 7
Reasons to visit this hilariously named café: endless

Fully Tabooly
Pemulwuy

Generally when you’re in the mood for a kebab, you’re also in the mood for a bit of a laugh and you can get both of these with a visit to Fully Tabooly. Offering up all your classic kebab shop fare, you’re sure to get a solid feed and a solid laugh at Fully Tabooly.

Doody Bird Café
Alexandria

The menu at Doody Bird is a doozy, stacked with everything you could want from bacon and eggs, sandwiches, gourmet burgers and focaccia. Check out the noodle bar, which is flexible with your choice of sauce, noodles and ingredients. Doody Bird Café is pretty much the casual local café your hangover dreams of.

Mad Fo Chicks
Eastwood

Mad Fo Chicks is a Korean snack shop focusing on fried chicken and fried potato. There is so much greatness in that first sentence we’re hungry at the thought of it. The ‘tornado potato’ is reminiscent of the classic carnival ‘potato-on-stick’ delight, a perfect artery clogging side-kick to the fried chicken hero, which you can have either marinated or classically fried.

The Middle Feast
Merrylands West

If a feast is what you’re after, a feast you shall have at, Lebanese restaurant, The Middle Feast. Watch the chef prepare traditional, freshly prepared Lebanese food, with a vast selection of dips, mezza and grilled meats on offer. They offer a take-away menu too, so you can feast in your own castle!

Surry Gills
Surry Hills (obviously)

A local fish ‘n’ chip shop with Surry Hills flair, Surry Gills offers all the classics like beer-battered fish and crumbled calamari as well as offering alternative options like fish burgers, fried fish wings with house made sauce and fried school prawns with pepper and aioli.

Wok This Way
Dawes Point

Wok This Way is a classic Chinese restaurant right near the Sydney Theatre, which is nice and convenient if you’re planning a ‘dinner and a show’ kind of night. Whatever you choose from the vast menu, you’re definitely going to get the song stuck in your head and have the perfect conversation point: Aerosmith or Run DMC, who does it better?

MELBOURNE

Wat Da Pho
South Melbourne

“I don’t know what the f you’re doing for lunch, but I’m going to Wat Da Pho”. Here we have hilarity mixed with confusion but with guaranteed delicious Vietnamese food. This South Melbourne restaurant continues the playful quirks throughout the menu, referring to chargrilled skewers as ‘Da Sticks’ and finding your spring roll choices under the title ‘Ching Rolls’. The main game here though, is the pho and there are plenty of options in regards to noodles and extra goodies to put in your broth.

Gaylords
Melbourne

In the heart of Chinatown you don’t expect to find a restaurant called Gaylords, and it’s even more surprising to find out it’s an Indian restaurant. But believe it or not, it exists and it’s worth a visit. Gaylords authentic Indian food, and memorable name, have become a Melbourne institution and has been given the global spotlight, catering events in Europe, the Middle East and New York.

Kum Den  
Melbourne

A classic Chinese restaurant with a dedicated MySpace page (when MySpace used to be a thing. Remember that? Almost unsurprisingly, you can find Kum Den down an alley of sex shop back doors. After a scenic walk past such establishments, you may be right in doubting the validity and sanitation of a restaurant called Kum Den, but you’re in for a pleasant surprise. The fish freshly steamed from the tank is perfectly cooked with ginger and spring onion, a clean end to perhaps a not so clean evening out on the town.

New Kum Den
Melbourne

Focusing on fresh, quality food on a budget, New Kum Den specialises in Cantonese cuisine in the heart of Chinatown. The dumpling and dim-sum list are lengthy enough to create a feast perfect for sharing after a few drinks, but there are plenty of more substantial classics on offer, like Kung Po Chicken and Salt and Pepper Pork Ribs.

Lucky Coq
Windsor

Lucky Coq focusses on comfort, value and entertainment and is absolutely that. It’s the kind of local hang out you dream about, where you can hang around with your friends on the outdoor rooftop or comfy indoor couches, eat great cheap pizza and listen to cool music. Your options for alcohol are almost endless, with a continually changing tap beer list always giving you a selection of the best new and old beers from Australia and around the world.

Bimbo Deluxe
Fitzroy

This Fitzroy icon is open seven days a week, staying open well into the early morning so you can easily party it up longer with this bad girl. When you’re not chilling out on the rooftop you can throw some shapes on the dance floor downstairs, home to some of the best DJs in Melbourne spinning every kind of music from hip hop to house to funk.

Lord Of The Fries
Multiple locations

If your stomach is your manor house, Lord Of The Fries is the benevolent master and leader. Everything on offer is vegetarian, so it’s an egalitarian society that everyone can enjoy. The variety of sauces for your chips is endless and exciting, so obviously you’re going to have to make multiple visits so you can work out your favourite combination and then convince all your friends that yours is the best one.

Massive Wieners
Prahan

What's not to love about the name Massive Wieners? As expected, the guys here serve up foot-long hot dogs (hence the massive), fries and shakes. Conveniently, they're also open late on weekends which means you can get your sausage fix up until 4.30am on Saturday nights/Sunday mornings.

BRISBANE

The Cod Father
Kedron

A classic Australian take away shop offering fish and chips, chiko rolls, savs in batter and pineapple fritters, The Cod Father menu is sure to make you an offer you can’t refuse. Like the food on offer, the prices take you back to your childhood too, cheap and cheerful, so you may as well splurge and get the ‘lot’ with your burger.

Flick N Beans
Bowen Hills

The coffee game at Flick N Beans is on point, with the staff at this friendly café determined to make a coffee that suits you and your tastes, leaving you a very satisfied customer. All the usual café food suspects are on offer, with delicious pastries and scones accompanying toasties and wraps for a full-blown carb and coffee fest. Bliss.

The Flying Cock
Fortitude Valley

Like the name of this pub, the menu is full of embarrassing, dad-joke humour and puns, but don’t let that put you off, because the food at The Flying Cock is worth the cringe-factor. The ‘Captain Chooks Slopped-Up Abroad’ is a mouth-watering chicken burger with blue cheese sauce and their take on popcorn chicken – ‘Kylie Minogue is The Queen of Popcorn chicken’ – is the perfect accompaniment to a drink or four.

A Salt & Battery
St Lucia

Crunchy batter, hot flaky fish and crispy chips dusted in salt are everything you want from your fish and chip shop. A steady stream of regulars is testament to the humble favourites of hamburgers and fish and chips which this Brisbane restaurant is doing right.

Image credit: Lord Of The Fries, Fleetwood Macchiato, Surry Gills, Flick N Beans

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