Funny

50 Things You’ll Miss When You Move Away From The Gold Coast

By Danielle Read - 11 Oct 2017

The Gold Coast is abundant with iconic cityscapes, pristine seaside scenery and all of your favourite exotically-flavoured chicken wings. But there comes a time in most of our lives where we must spread our own chicken wings and fly the coop that is GC living.

The fact that this is an inevitable lifestyle change for some may not soften the blow, but everyone has their reasons. Maybe you’ve outgrown your Broadbeach apartment or have fallen head over heels and are being blackmailed to move to Sydney with your new love?

Whatever the case may be, and despite having the occasional tiff with your Gold Coast homeland, there are so many things you’ll miss when you’re gone. And of course, the love-to-hate memories you won’t truly appreciate until you’ve relocated elsewhere.

To celebrate our ripper city, we’ve summarised 50 things you’ll miss when you move away from the Gold Coast. Cue the water works.

1. Boozy Sunday arvos on Burleigh Hill perving on surfers with your mates.

2. Over-taking cars on your pushy while riding down Hedges with a six pack in your basket.

3. Sipping margaritas at Miami Marketta while giving a tuba player your sexy eyes.

4. Getting star struck when Mick Fanning sits at the neighbouring table while having breakfast in Tugun.

5. Secret late night Uber adventures into Surfers to sing karaoke at Tune Up with that one friend who swears they won’t tell any one.

6. Catching the 700 bus and knowing that it will magically carry you home.

7. Living a block away from the beach and million-dollar mansions but paying less than $100 a week to rent your room in a share house.

8. That rush you feel when you get every green light from Broadbeach to Miami or the entire strip of Palm Beach.

9. Not having to wash your car all that often because every one else has sea-salt incrusted windows too.

10. Complaining that it’s hot, then going to the beach to complain that it’s windy, and then going home for a well deserved nap.

11. $15 Parmy and paddle deals at Bine.

12. Catching up with a friend for a casual drink at Pacific Fair, accidentally getting sloshed and maxing out the credit card in the impulse shopping spree that follows.

13. Those little smiley face speed signs on the esplanade in Miami and Mermaid that tell you you’re doing a good job.

14. Saying “the Gold Coast Titans are sick!” When you don’t really follow footy but get amongst the brotherhood that is the Gold Coast community spirit. #noragrets

15. Determining who is worthy of being a part of your friendship group by asking them which side of the highway they live on and backing away slowly if they don’t say beach side.

16. Ridiculously cheap chicken wings at basically every nook bar in town.

17. Checking which airport your friend needs to be picked up from before agreeing to give them a lift.

18. Going on a long, beautiful road trip to… Coolangatta.

19. All of the so-shitty-they’re-good cover bands at Liars Bar.

20. Parking across the road from the GC Airport and never having to pay for parking while you’re away on holidays.

21. Eating oysters next to millionaires at Rick Shores and pretending that you too own three restaurants and a 12-bedroom house.

22. Going to Après Surf purely for the chips and cuties behind the bar.

23. Seeing the Burleigh Running Man on your drive to work each morning.

24. Scoffing when asking for directions and someone says, “it’s on the Gold Coast Highway.” But where, mate?

25. Always being within walking distance to the beach but never actually going.

26. The smorgasbord of slightly different acai bowls scattered across the city.

27. Feeling like an adult when swiping your surf club card.

28. Being able to seamlessly move between greasy burger love and gluten-free health guru, while having both lifestyles catered for.

29. $2 over-the-counter thongs at Shark Bar when you’re thirsty for beer after a surf and don’t have shoes.

30. The hipsters of Nobby Beach.

31. Hibernating with good movies, snacks, and your buddies during Schoolies Week.

32. The two-week period when you can drive down the GC600 track before the event while road works are in a weird limbo.

33. Judging which beach you’re at by the name of the street it lines up with, “we’re at the beach, out the front of Heron!”

34. Surprising all of your non-Gold Coast friends by being the palest person they’ve ever seen.

35. Catching the tram and feeling like a successful new-age businessman/woman because you can now claim that you “commute” to work.

36. Telling all of your tourist friends that Harbour Town isn’t really any cheaper.

37. Getting your mates together and cooking bacon sangas in your front yard while the Gold Coast Marathon competitors run past your house each year.

38. Acting casual on the Justin Lane Rooftop but secretly feeling like GC royalty.

39. “Accidentally” going to Chevron Island instead of Marina Mirage for a date because they both sound fancy—but Chevron Island is cheaper.

40. Getting the courtesy bus home from the surf club even though you only live two blocks away.

41. Complaining that no big music acts come to the Gold Coast and then not going when they do. NightQuarter? That’s a freakin’ mission.

42. Not having your dog on a leash at the beach despite the signs and never really getting in trouble.

43. Watching kite surfers from Miami headland and wondering if they’ll get sucked out to sea and you’ll be the only person who knows.

44. Photo bombing wedding shots in Burleigh.

45. Doughnut Time runs on the way home from the gym.

46. $17 cocktails that feel worth the price tag after three or four.

47. Taking visitors to Cambus Wallace and reveling in their joyous expressions, like when a bride walks into her wedding but you look at the groom instead.

48. Trying to keep up with if long hair and beards are in, or are short hair and tight jeans now cool again?

49. Never really knowing what true cold weather feels like.

50. Counting all of the early morning runners you see. Then stopping at double figures because you start feeling bad about yourself on the way to Maccas drive thru.

Honestly though, why would you ever want to go? There’s 33 reasons why you’ll never be able to leave the Gold Coast.

Image credit: Brooke Darling for The Urban List

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