It’s not hard to find a good breakfast in Melbourne. Just close your eyes and throw a brick. Chances are good you’ll hit something delicious that’ll one day compromise your ability to buy a house. But the city’s breakfast menu is definitely an ever-moving target. In the time it takes to eat a single chilli scrambled, five new ones will have popped up round the corner. Lucky you’ve got us
gluttonous monsters discerning critics to go around and taste them all on your behalf.
If you’re sitting down to plot August’s brekky expeditions, here are our top picks. The 11 breakfasts you have to get in your gob this month.
Calentao Rolo With Fried Eggs & Avocado
Buenos Dias | Carlton North
Oh. My. God. This bowl is officially off-the-charts delicious. Buenos Dias is a brand new South American cafe on Nicholson St, serving up authentic brunch from Chile, Colombia, Brazil and Argentina, and they've created what could be our favourite breakfast bowl of all time. Calentao Rolo is wild Spanish rice mixed with house-made chorizo sausage, pulled pork and mixed beans, topped with two perfect fried eggs, crispy-fried arepa and a side of lemony smashed av'. We would crawl back over hot coals for another forkful of this stuff. Legit.
Slow-Cooked Beef Cheeks On Rosemary Hash
STN | Northcote
Northcote’s brand new London-inspired cafe is dishing out one of the breakfasts of the year. Two gooey poached eggs atop a rosemary-spiked potato hash, covered in decadent béarnaise and served with spiced cabbage, apple slaw and melt-in-your-mouth beef cheek. Basically a fancy AF benedict. Rich and ridiculous, but not so OTT that you’ll spend the rest of the day groaning on the couch in your underwear.
Good Egg | South Melbourne
Good Egg is a dedicated egg cafe that opened recently in South Melbourne. Safe to say, they know how to do eggs. Their egg and bacon roll is an absolute ripper (it comes with Swiss cheese and Houses Of Parliament sauce), but for something a bit different, give the scotch eggs a try. They come in two styles: well-seasoned falafel or a crumbed pork & fennel sausage meat. Guess which one we favour. Mmmm...sausage meat...
White Bean Hummus & Haloumi
A Fan’s Notes | Carlton North
If you haven’t checked out A Fans Notes yet, do yourself a massive favour. It’s a scruffy little Northside gem, with a big focus on vegan and veggo dishes. Case in point: their white bean & artichoke hummus on toast, served with golden fried halloumi and an eye-watering harissa paste. Spicy, creamy, vaguely healthy. It’s everything you could want from a meat-free breakfast. Pro tip: come back on Thursday nights for an epic vegan roast.
Kings & Knaves Espresso | CBD
Well, not JUST toast. Kings & Knaves Espresso is the CBD’s new toast bar, so you should expect something a bit fancier than your standard butter and vegemite...as delicious as that combo may be. The bread is 100% Noisette and comes with epic toppings like smoked salmon, St David’s Dairy crème fraiche, house-made berry compote (not all at once). Our favourite is the vegan hazelnut spread on sourdough, topped with ripe banana, sea salt and maple syrup. Effing YUM.
Epic Schnitzle Bap
Hector’s Deli | Richmond
Richmond’s latest sandwich temple, Hector's Deli, is generating some serious buzz. And part of it’s down to this particular sanga. Perfectly fried chicken schnitzel (not too thin, not too thick), a pillowy soft bap roll (from Baker's Delight, no less) shredded iceberg lettuce and a spicy secret sauce. That’s it. No bells and whistles, just an insane schnitzel sandwich. The only catch is the rest of Richmond has figured it out too: these babies sell like pan-fried hot cakes. Hector's usually sells out before 1pm, so get in early to snag your sandwich.
Mac n’ Cheese Pie
Murray’s Food Store | Prahran
One of our favourite openings of 2017. What did we do before Murray’s? Seriously. There are two people to thank for bringing this Prahran institution back from the brink: hospo power-couple India Gauci and Jeremy Gaschk (of Easey’s fame). Murray’s does some smashing bagels, but the real fun is the pie menu, especially the mac n’ cheese pie: fluffy golden pastry surrounding gooey mac n’ cheese. Wash it down with a retro grape soda. It’s a beautiful way to start the day.
Chilli Scramble With Labne
The Spot | Coburg
You’ll find The Spot in the part of Coburg usually marked ‘Here Be Dragonz’, the culinary no-man’s-land north of Albion St. It’s a cute Middle Eastern cafe, tucked under one of those new housing developments, and it’s produced our frontrunner for Chilli Scramble Of 2017. A beautiful swirl of harissa-red scramble, topped with fanned avocado, edible flowers and a killer house-made labne. One for the chilli fiends out there.
Sourdough With Butter
My Son. Joy | South Melbourne
Now this may seem weird. My Son, Joy is South Melbourne’s latest nutrition-based cafe, and owner co-owner Neale White has put together a gorgeous little menu. But for us the real standout was his one-of-a-kind European style home-baked sourdough, served warm out of the oven with a wodge of salted butter. This stuff is like bread crack. Dense, doughy and chewy, it’s not like any sourdough we’ve ever tried before. Go be weird and order a big plate of it.
Vanilla Yoghurt Panna Cotta
Rustica Canteen | Hawthorn
The latest outpost in the ever-growing Rustica empire, Rustica Canteen opened its doors in Hawthorn a few months ago, and the Saturday morning queue is already quite intense. You’ve got your standard Rustica treats (defs pick up a cronut or two for the drive home), but when it comes to brekky we recommend the vanilla yogurt panna cotta with banana, strawberries, house granola, micro lemon balm and blueberry dust. Yep, blueberry dust. ‘Nuff said.
Bacon & Egg Roll
Crate Specialty Coffee | Heidelberg West
You’d think with Melbourne’s addiction to fancy food, the humble bacon and egg roll would have died out long ago. Thank god that didn’t happen. We try this bad boy pretty much everywhere we go, and one of the best we’ve eaten this year was at a little Heidelberg West cafe called Crate, tucked inside a warren of anonymous backstreets. Free-range Gamze Smokehouse bacon, a gooey Burd free-range egg, tasty cheese, roquette and house-made relish on a toasted Dench ciabatta roll. Sometimes the basic stuff really is the best.
Since you're gonna be eating out a lot this month, you'll need this one: meet the 7 worst people you'll find at brunch.
Image credit: Jenna Fahey-White