Funny

33 Thoughts We All Have During An Aussie Spring

By Millie Lester - 06 Sep 2017


We have finally been relinquished from winter’s long and crusty grasp, and the smell of fresh flowers and magpies fills the air as the spring months descend upon us in all its sinusy glory *takes a breath and chokes on an agapanthus*.

Here are 33 thoughts every Aussie has during spring.

  1. F*ck you magpies
  2. F*ck you pollen
  3. Gotta put together my Xmas list for Mum
  4. Is it illegal to take flowers from other people’s gardens?
  5. Gotta remember to pack my puffer in case of #thunderstormasthma
  6. Should I shave my legs or nah?
  7. Time to switch to SPF15+ moisturiser
  8. Can you OD on Telfast?
  9. Is it bad to take Telfast and Codral at the same time?
  10. Alfresco dining gives me life
  11. Can you buy dining table waterproofing at Bunnings?
  12. I wonder if my boss will let me work from home, from the park
  13. I shouldn’t have thrown out all my holey tights
  14. It is not warm enough for bare legs yet
  15. Is it too early to slowly phase into a new foundation tone?
  16. Is a cheese board for dinner four nights in a row too many?
  17. Gotta remember to try my bathers on tonight
  18. Can I pass a fake tan off for a long afternoon in the backyard yet?
  19. When can I expect to shed my winter weight?
  20. Can the body still function without the sinuses?
  21. Can you get fined for driving while having a severe hay fever attack?
  22. Do I have to switch mashed potato for leafy greens now?
  23. If so, this is not the world I want to live in
  24. Surely the Maccas Monopoly promotion is coming back soon
  25. Should I buy a Falls ticket or groceries?
  26. I am loving this shorts weather
  27. It’s still definitely too cold to start running in the morning though
  28. If you steal a guide dog from a blind person, will you come back as a magpie in your next life?
  29. Is it true that all the dead plants in your house can revive themselves in spring?
  30. Is it possible to be allergic to tissues?
  31. Are lambs good house pets?
  32. What are the legal consequences for housing a lamb if your realtor has expressly denied your requests in writing, in person and over the phone?
  33. Is it summer yet?

Image credit: Suhyeon Choi

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