Gold Coasters are usually a calm bunch. Not much riles us up simply because we are surrounded by some of the best beaches, pristine waterways, on trend cafes and super friendly wildlife. Basically, we are busy living a 10/10 lifestyle.
So, we don’t appreciate when that one cousin from Melbourne visits and points out things that are simply not true (sometimes) about our golden city. How dare you, Susan! Go back to St Kilda…
Anyway, here’s a list of things to avoid saying within an earshot of us if you want to keep your face free from a stray beach ball.
- You know where has good restaurants? Brisbane.
- Let’s go surf Snapper on the weekend/public holiday/Quiky Pro time.
- The M1 will definitely be quicker.
- I promise I won’t get any sand in your car.
- Full cream milk is the only true milk.
- I dropped in on Fanning/Parko/Steph today.
- Hahahahahaha… Hooker Boulevard/Nobby Beach.
- Bush Turkeys are like a poor, misunderstood, feathered doggo.
- Paid parking helps create more available spaces.
- The coffee in Melbourne is WAY better.
- Coffee? No, I’m more of a tea drinker.
- Leg ropes are so restrictive and unnecessary.
- New week, new Titans player injured.
- Let’s go for a leisurely stroll down Cavill Ave tonight.
- I’ve just got to get changed out of my active wear…now that I’m not being active.
- Well, if Tom Tate says it’s true, it must be true!
- One day I might buy a house in Burleigh.
- Let’s make our hire car a convertible! Sooooo cool.
- Three wide? Let cyclists go four wide. Hell, here’s the road, I’ll just walk.
- Schoolies week is my favourite week!
- Let’s take all your nieces and nephews to Wet ‘n’ Wild…in the December holidays!
- There’s very little research to show acai is actually good for you.
- I don’t like Rosé…do they have any Chardonnay?
- Rooftop bars are just so open to the elements…let’s stay inside.
- Can I borrow your NutriBullet?
Looking for more LOLs. Here are 26 things Gold Coasters need to explain to out of towners.
Image credit: Brooke Darling for The Urban List