Summer: the season we love to love when it’s not here. Whoever came up with the phrase “Endless Summer”, had obviously never lived through a classic Queensland stonker.
At the start we all be like: “Ooh yeah, this is so good, can’t wait to be at the beach EVERY. DAMN. WEEKEND.” Then, by the time autumn hits, we’re scurrying to and fro between shady spots like some Vampire Diaries Does The Tropics extras. (Worst spin-off ever?)
Not to be spiteful, but we want to make it clear that our most loved/loathed season should stay away for at least nine months, so here are 15 reasons we are stoked to see the back of summer.
1. 31°C is considered a cool change in summer. WTF?
2. “I’m so burnt my blisters have blisters” will be downgraded to casual 2nd degree roasting.
3. This won’t happen to our make-up anymore.
4. We won’t have to get dressed for two climates (icy cold air-con + fiery inferno) when getting ready for work.
5. Catch ya later, permanent frizz ‘do.
6. Go fug yourself, sweat. We’re for more temperate autumn days.
7. The thongs and singlet uniform becomes a little less acceptable.
8. We tell ourselves we’ll do way more exercise in the morning because it won’t be edging 40°C by 5am.
9. No more worrying about the “perfect beach body”, whatever that means…
10. We’ll take our waxer’s number off speed-dial (although maybe we shouldn’t).
11. All the world’s sucky creatures (read: mosquitoes) may stop using us as their version of a fast-food joint. Fingers crossed.
12. Our level of storm related anxiety will go from apocalyptic-cyclone high back to small-scale storm cell low.
13. The surf won’t be a choppy mess every afternoon after we finish work. Hello, westerlies!
14. You can get into the car without your hands melting off, or feeling like you are going to implode.
15. Cooler weather = legitimate excuse to stay in the house and catch up on all that Netflix we missed while we were being beach bums.