7 Reasons You Should Never Do Yoga

By Simone Jovel
21st Jul 2016

Urban Yoga in Sydney
Urban Yoga in Sydney
Urban Yoga in Sydney
Urban Yoga in Sydney
Urban Yoga in Sydney
Urban Yoga in Sydney
Urban Yoga in Sydney
Urban Yoga in Sydney
Urban Yoga in Sydney
Urban Yoga in Sydney

Is it just us, or is everyone’s Instafeed filled on the regular with gorgeous looking yogis, their rock hard abs, smiling faces and their overall #winningatlife selfies? You know what we’re talking about, a good ol’ Namaste Mudra, on a cliff, at sunset. 

It’s almost as though yoga is the missing piece in the happiness and fitness puzzle, a kind of magical train that we should all be jumping on, but can it really be all sunsets and fun? We asked the guys at Sydney yoga studio, Urban Yoga for some of the most common reasons not to do yoga. What you do next is up to you.

#1 You’re A Guy

At the top of the list when it comes to putting one’s active wear back in the cupboard is if you happen to be a man. Say it with us fellas, why would you want incredible posture, serious muscle definition and all of that flexibility anyways? You definitely shouldn’t be considering taking up one of the male only yoga classes available at Urban Yoga, where you can perfect that downward dog, you just shouldn’t. 

#2 Your Sex Life Is Already Pretty Epic 

Now we know you’re pretty much likened to a love god between the sheets, but did you know that yoga actually improves your sex life? It’s the perfect exercise to work those kegels aka the muscles that control the level of your, ahem, pleasure. It’s also pretty obvious that when you look good, you feel good, and that feeling good makes you want to, how do we say, want to feel good with that special someone more often. You’ll also have more energy and increase your flexibility with regular practice, lucky for you though, there’s no room for improvement.

#3 It’s Boring AF

For many the thought of a yoga studio conjures up visions of too much incense and excessive use of whale sounds, and we agree, you should run fast and far from those studios. However a studio with high definition screens that run off the same technology as Vivid Sydney, with curated beats mixed by a professional DJ sound a lot more like our kind of deal, and that’s exactly what you can expect at Urban Yoga.

#4 You Can’t Stand On Your Head 

Obviously yogis were yogis from day one and the whole practice makes perfect idea is just something people say for laughs. It’s not like people actually take beginners’ classes, like the ones at Urban Yoga, and learn to perfect their practice over time, you either have the skills or you don’t. 

#5 You Don’t Need Chill Time

You already live in a zen-like bubble, you’re relaxed all the time, nothing stresses you out and you always manage to make at least one hour a day for yourself. The classes at Urban Yoga are the perfect place to say “stress, away with you”—if you had any, that is.

#6 There’s No Alcohol

Why you would get out of bed for something that doesn’t involve wine is a mystery to most of us and your run of the mill yoga classes almost always suffer from a serious lack of booze. Unless it’s Urban Yoga’s Offbeat events, where your class is followed by wine, beer and snacks. 

#7 You Can’t Speak Sanskrit

You pretty much have to be bilingual to understand your yoga practice and ain’t nobody got time for that when you’re trying to get your leg behind your head. It’s only in our dreams that we could find a place that uses English instead, with the occasional Namaste thrown in for good measure.

Image credit: Federica Portentoso

Editor's note: This article is sponsored by Urban Yoga and proudly endorsed by The Urban List. Thank you for supporting the sponsors who make The Urban List possible. Click here for more information on our editorial policy.

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