There’s more than one reason your mother always told you to never trust someone who doesn’t like bacon. Bacon, otherwise known as perfection on a plate, the O.G hangover cure, and the Beyoncé of food, is a staple of the Aussie diet.
Come Sunday mornings it’s probably the only real friend you have. Who was there for you when you’ve had one too many drinks on a night out? Bacon. What food did you indulge in when your ex broke up with you? Bacon. And finally, what gets you through the working week knowing there’s an end in sight? Bacon. So, haters see you laters, because bacon is there for us #forlife.
Croissant + double smoked bacon + mac ‘n’ cheese = heart attack. Only kidding, the only attack you’ll have is a panic attack when you realise you only ordered one Bacon Mac-Daddy, better make that two ASAP. This glorious combination will totally make you back out of your New Year’s diet resolution, which, let’s be honest, was over a while ago. All we’re doing is giving you the gentle push you need to accept it. We got you.
When you have ‘The ultimate bacon & egg roll’ on your menu you kiiinnda have to live up to it. Which Contessa Balmain totally does! Think hickory smoked bacon, fried eggs, provolone cheese, house made relish and mayo on a toasted brioche and there you have it. Hangover cured!
Bacon doubters have obviously never tried Three Williams Maple Bacon Blini. This is where you take a bacon sceptic, and have these so-called-friends say directly to your face they don’t like it. How could they say horrible things about a buckwheat pancake with maple bacon, poached egg, apple hollandaise and bacon crumb? Spoiler alert: They won’t, they’ll turn to the dark side (mwahaha).
Paramount Coffee Project
OK so the buttermilk fried chicken waffle was, like, sooo 2016. Right? Wrong. You didn’t think to add bacon, did you? Well, our loyal pals over at the PCP did, and it rules! It’s like everything you’ve ever wanted in your twisted bacon fantasy, only better. Hot tip: add crispy chats with chipotle mayo. Don’t think. Just Do.
BLACK Bar & Grill
There’s mac ‘n’ cheese and there’s mac ‘n’ cheese. The latter is added with bacon crumbs at BLACK Bar & Grill. Think of bacon crumbs like fairy dust, sprinkled on something to make all your wildest dreams come true. Magical.
We can’t condone getting blazed, high or whatever you kids are calling it these days. But we can suggest the stoner’s delight at Ms G’s in Potts point. Layered in donut ice cream, peanut dulche de leche, Mars Bar brownie, and candied bacon, this is a match made in stoner heaven. But even for the moral folks, this dessert is truly #inspirational, weed be mad not to try it!
Orange Grove Markets
Don’t you just love markets? And how the smell of fresh flowers fills the air? Jokes. The smell of bacon is what we’re after, and Orange Grove has fulfilled this wish. With a line that suggests a celebrity meet and greet, think again. The people know what they want, and they’re lining up for a good ol’ BBQ bacon and egg roll. Held every Saturday, skip your acai bowl in your active wear, and head on down for a classic B&E roll that’s like a hug from the inside.
The only thing these guys are blaming their bacon addiction on is Canada. The burger option, blame Canada, comes with a beef patty; American cheese and maple glazed streaky bacon. We’ll blame you for our food coma, but we’ll never blame you for bringing Justin Trudeau into the world, Canada.
What’s better than bacon? Butter, obvs. Now what about bacon butter? The geniuses at Mr. G’s are one step ahead of you, serving this up on the daily, paired with their renowned wood-fired steak. Yes, it all sounds too good to be true, but it isn’t. Just a hint, don’t wear high-wasted jeans or anything that’s too constricting around the waste-line. It will just get in the way and ruin the experience.
Kepos Street Kitchen
When it comes to organising your Sunday brunch plans Kepos is the place to B&E. Their roll comes on a fresh, toasted brioche bun, with extra crispy bacon, a delicious chilli jam, spinach and roasted tomatoes. If you’re already planning how you’re going to manage this, we’ll tell you. Get in your car; place the stick into D and drive to Redfern, where your delightful bacon and egg bun awaits you.
If you’re picky with your bacon (you know who you are), and you like it that extra bit crispy, look no further. Euforia’s wood-smoked streaky American bacon is the closest you’ll come to that marvellous crunch. Served with wood-smoked pork belly, eggs, and mushrooms, this dish is the ultimate homage to bacon, and we’re not fakin’.
The big boy ain’t no joke. A bacon and egg roll packed to the max with caramelised onion, Swiss cheese and a blend of sauces makes this one hell of a roll. Although Smalltown is renowned for its presentation, with flower petals placed delicately on pancakes, don’t worry because their bacon and egg roll was made to be manhandled. If people judge, just say its Paleo—because the cave men ate with their hands.
If you love cake more than bacon, head here.
Image credit: Cuckoo Callay