Funny

10 Of The Worst Things That Are Most Likely To Happen When You Leave Your Phone At Home

By Zoe Kirby - 02 Apr 2016

You’ve gone and done the unthinkable—the one thing that makes you question how you’re supposed to get through the next 15 minutes, let alone a whole freakin’ day.

Yep, your little block of magic aka your phone, went and buried itself sneakily down the side of the couch. You, on the other hand, have to get to work. Phoneless. Clueless. And fuming that Facebook will go on without you! And that’s just the beginning.

Here’s 10 of the worst things that are most likely to happen when you leave your phone at home. Brace yourselves, peeps. They ain’t pretty!

1. You’ll get lost…

And spend three hours of your day, plus $10 of your coffee fund on attempting to work out the public transport system (or lack thereof), instead of spending 30 seconds and probably $2 less on an Uber with a friendly driver, complimentary mints, and bottles of water. THE worst!

2. Your crush of the day on Tinder messages you back…
Or he won’t. But you’ll spend the entire day fantasising over what he might have said… where you’ll go on your first date… your first kiss… when he’ll meet your parents… your honeymoon destination… how many kids you’re going to have…

3. You’ll actually have to talk to your colleagues at lunch…
Or sit there awkwardly while they catch up on the latest goss on Facebook, watch the funniest cat videos, and read up on the new cafe that has opened up on the beachfront, courtesy of Metropolist, of course.

4. Severe FOMO…
What if your ex-best friend’s sister broke up with her boyfriend? Or someone took a photo of their new pug in a taco costume? Or someone else is pregnant? Oh, the feels.

5. You make eye contact with a human being…
Without aimless scrolling and pointless text messaging you’re bound to make eye contact with your crush from school. Who you haven’t seen in eight years. Or the random sat opposite you on the train. So awks!

6. You order breakfast and the food is totally Instagram-worthy…
Well bummer, there goes the potential for 50 likes and an artificial boost of self-confidence.

7. Someone rides past you on a unicycle…
And an umbrella hat that spins round and round, and you instantly get sad because it would have been a perfect moment for your Snapchat story.

8. You can’t transfer money from your holiday fund to your everyday account…
So you’re stood there, like the broke 20-something that you are because you have no way to pay for your $8.50 green juice.

9. You can’t track your after work 5km jog on your Lorna Jane app…
What’s even the point of running let alone moving, if you can’t track how many glasses of wine you burnt off?

10. You get home after your long and tortuous day, thinking of all the messages and notifications you’re going to have…
Yet your beloved, precious phone has no messages, no notifications and simply no lovin’. You realise that maybe your day wasn’t so bad without it, and you may even try it again sometime—on purpose. Maybe. Probably not.

Image Credit: Bridesmaids

Our best stories, direct to your inbox, helping you to out-trend your mates every weekend...

Tags:

Evergreen

You May Also Like