Sometimes it feels plain dirty forking out precious frosé money for a bowl of rice, raw fish and cucumber, which is why we’ve searched high and low for a foolproof poké bowl recipe that can reduce the chance of your car getting repossessed.
Here’s how to make a deconstructed salmon avocado poké bowl at home. You’re already excited, I can tell.
- 2/3 cups of short grain rice (brown if you’re feeling extra healthy)
- 1 medium cucumber, sliced length ways
- 1 avocado, sliced
- 1/2 cup of shelled edamame
- 1/2 grated carrot
- 1 1/2 tbsp of pickled ginger
- 100g of smoked salmon, cut into small pieces
- 1 tbsp of sesame seeds
- 1 sheet of nori, cut into thin strips
- 1 tsp of wasabi paste
- 1/4 cup of rice vinegar
- 2 tbsp of soy sauce
- Pen a heavily worded email to Marlene King for her RIDICULOUS PLL series finale including a whole dot-point on how Troian Bellisario’s English accent was worse than Kate McKinnon’s Australian accent in Rough Night.
- Pop to the shops to pick up the ingredients. Remind yourself that you don’t need fourteen Caramelo Koalas because you’re on a diet, which is why you’re in the supermarket tracking down ingredients for a cold rice bowl with wet fish.
- Come home and call your dad to ask him what a flashing battery-shaped light on the car dashboard means, and then cook the brown rice according to the instructions on the packet before then removing it from the heat and letting it cool completely (just like you car).
- Spoon the cooked rice into a large bowl, evenly distribute every ingredient that’s not wasabi, rice vinegar and soy sauce on top of the rice (in any order you like; your life your choices).
- Whisk the aforementioned sauce ingredients in a small bowl until combined and drizzle your homemade dressing on top of the wet fish cold rice vegetable bowl.
- Attempt to eat with chopsticks and then give up and get a fork because you’re too goddamn hungry for this sh*t.
- Instagram with the hashtag #someonebringmebeefmasala.
Check out all of our recipes here.
Image credit: Jessica Prince